Saturday 30 July 2011

"I've got a cross-trainer", "I'm not surprised he's angry, you never do any exercise!"

@RalphMighty is due back from camping in a field with a million children today. It's a race to see which will arrive first, him or my cross-trainer.

@RalphMighty doesn't know that we are getting a cross-trainer. He went camping last Friday evening and I ordered the cross-trainer on Monday morning.

I have been talking about getting one for at least 2 years and we've even been to look at some with a view to a purchase but whenever I get close to ordering @RalphMighty always rightly asks 'Where are you going to PUT it?' and he has a point. I would put it in the spare room but there's no room what with the piano, 3 keyboards, amp, accordion, guitar, and shelving unit full of records and sheet music, not to mention The CD Mountain... No, no, none of those things are mine.

I am now working on the hope that @RalphMighty will be more amenable to the idea of a large piece of exercise equipment in our bedroom if he sees it there first.

It comes from that last bastion of the 90's, Argos, so is arriving flat-packed. Which means that not only do I have to wait at the mercy of delivery men for it to be delivered but I also have to put it together before @RalphMighty gets home so that he can see it in all it's assembled glory and say "Wow! No matter that I can't open my wardrobe door or see out of the window any more - that is one fine cross-trainer". Of course a more likely scenario is that @RalphMighty will arrive home with a week's worth of camping equipment, dying for a bath and find me self-harming with an allen key on the bedroom floor surrounded by bits of metal.


So, as I continue my vigil at the window in the vain hope of seeing that longed-for blue van, please hum the Kinks 'Tired of Waiting' to yourselves and I will keep you updated on my self-assembly progress.
I'll start you off:
"I'm so tired, tired of waiting, tired of waiting for you-oo-oo" ..........................

12:24 - Phone call from delivery man to say he will be here in an hour / hour and a half.

14:17 - Late, latidy-late! 
14: 36 - It's arrived!
14:50 - Polystyrene and metal everywhere! Here goes...
16:17 - The tension-wire is impossible to attach and I am tense (and bleeding!) but the wire is immune to it. 
16:55 - Spent an entire episode of Columbo and half an episode of Miss Marple trying to achieve this:

Tension is now achieved and a plaster applied. Phew!

19:50 - @RalphMighty phones to say he'll be back in about an hour. The race is on. I'm nearly done but the next bit involves wires, eep!

20:00 - Tis done! Tricky moment when it needed coaxing through the bedroom door but here it is, much smaller than I thought it would be, thankfully!
 

Right, I deserve a (non-alcoholic) beer

20:22 - @RalphMighty is back! I win!

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